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| A humorous view of new year resolution from Calvin and Hobbes |
December 1, 2010 By A. Gaffar Peang-Meth
PACIFIC DAILY NEWS
The new year will be upon us in 30 days. Some will reflect on the past. Sometimes such reflection helps us understand our present circumstances and may clarify next steps.
Still, those who understand human behavior warn against being endlessly mired in questions of why we are the way we are. It's easy to get stuck and be unable to move forward. Engaging your own creativity is a positive action that keeps you forward-focused.
In the new year, we can't repeat what we've always done and expect different outcomes. We need to strike a new path, look at old problems through a new lens. M.J. Ryan advises in her book, "This Year I Will ... " that we switch from "why" thinking to "what could be possible" thinking. Indeed, we're the change we want to see.
For most of us, life is hard in today's nasty financial and economic situation. Yet, food is not lacking, materials remain abundant, technology continues to thrive and bring change -- you can choose to ride, or not, in a vehicle that practically drives itself! There are people who live well; there are many who can't make ends meet.
On the world stage, national governments continue to compete for power, influence and prestige. The perennial clash between democracy activists and autocratic regimes that trample rights and freedom in the name of political stability and economic development raises many moral questions.
Constant struggle
Life is a constant struggle within ourselves and with pressures and temptations in the wider world.
Inwardly, the "I, me, mine" rule lives -- a source of greedy consumption that Lord Buddha saw as a source of "suffering." Outwardly, the same "I, me, mine" gives rise to a need to control, intensifying the just-unjust conflict.
Yet, humans everywhere basically want similar things: To be in good health; to enjoy a level of contentment in life; to be able to meet the basic necessities of life.
A democracy seeks to ensure that people live well. An autocracy seeks to remain in power by beating its people to obey and submit.
Focus on intelligence
Those who are schooled in the social sciences tell us it's not how much we know, but how we think, that determines our future. Some, however, mistake their opinions for analytical thought and knowledge. Opinions are based in our emotions.
Analytical thinking evolves from knowledge, from one's capacity to observe, wonder, imagine, inquire, interpret, evaluate, compare, relate, analyze, calculate and innovate. Our brains can be trained and taught to think better.
According to the Pew Research Center, nearly 85 percent of Americans say they are happy. Yet, those millions who are happy want to be happier still. People want more.
But look around. People live longer, eat better, have more things, but still many are stressed and depressed. The traffic is heavy, grocery lines are long, services are slow, people are rude, etc.
Lord Buddha saw man's insatiable consumption as a source of unhappiness and suffering that ends only through elimination of the need for more.
Positive thinking
A person with a "can do" attitude sees difficulties as opportunities; his or her questioning mind produces a panorama of alternatives to choose from. A person with a "can't do" attitude moves nowhere.
Whether in family life, at work, in the community, or in the world, positive thinking, backed by the power of one's imagination, energizes a person to engage in sustained assaults on problems and predicaments. Problems can be solved; predicaments addressed. It's about keeping things in perspective. Through sorrow we appreciate joy; through war we understand peace; through the negatives, we innovate and create new ways.
As we approach the new year, Khmer democrats should apply their capacity to imagine, relate and innovate to fight the dictatorship under which they live.
In earlier columns, I have connected several useful concepts. In traditional teaching, Khmer elders have urged us to waste nothing: curved wood can make a wheel, straight wood can make a spoke, and crooked wood can make firewood.
Psychologist-consultant Dr. Linda V. Berens identified four temperaments in humans: the theorist values competence, uses strategic analysis; the catalyst idealizes a vision, advocates, and brings people together toward self-actualization; the improviser seizes the moment and varies actions to get things done with what's available; and the stabilizer maintains order and stability through structures, and prevents institutional fragmentation.
An education leader of one of America's most successful public school systems, Jerry D. Weast, described as a leader's "toughest job, ... to move from strategy to execution." That requires the help of the "people who do the work" every day in their unsung roles in the office, the streets or field. They are the "heroes" moving the institution forward, he said.
A results-oriented human resources executive, Katharine Giacalone, says it's important to know who is on your team in order to maximize its effectiveness -- the peacemaker who wants every member to be included; the organizer, who wants everyone to line up and count off; the revolutionary who hates routine and prefers to adapt to the moment; or the smart and opinionated steamroller who handles opposite views and floats ideas at 30,000 feet.
Who is on your team and how can each member be most effective?
Be ready for the new year!
A. Gaffar Peang-Meth, Ph.D., is retired from the University of Guam. Write him at peangmeth@yahoo.com.
7 comments:
Dr. Peang-Meth,
Thanks for the words of wisdom. Positive thinking or hope is the only way to sustain and motivate any of us to strive for better tomorrow. Both disciplines in christianity and buddhism provide the mechanisms for positive thinking and right-living.
Money can buy things, but not everything translates into happiness. The motto should be that one should reach the highest of one's potential in doing good things to the world around oneself and be content with one's own limit.
Although it seems very surmountable to fight for what is right, the feeling of defeat resulting from not doing anything at all is far more difficult to live with.
Dr. Peang-Meth,
I wish you are an advisor to Hun Sen, since Hun Sen and his team are lack with such basic elements, they were brain washed by the evil's mind therefore their limited thinking ability is what they are.
But we are very happy to have you here I am your true fan and I read everything you wrote in this column.
Thank you ... sincerely
Kone khmer................USA
Positive thinking គេអាចអនុវត្តបាន លុះត្រាណា តែជននោះ មានសុខភាពល្អ មានស៊ីមានចុកគ្រប់
គ្រាន់ ។ តែបើរកព្រឹកខ្វះល្ងាច សុខភាពដុនដាប
ទាំងអស់នេះ តើពួកគេនឹងមានអារម្មណ៍ល្អទៅមេចនឹងកើត ?
កវីទាំងឡាយ និពន្ធក្បោះក្បាយ ព្រោះតែមិនឃ្លាន មានស៊ីមានចាយ ពូកែនិទាន សាកអត់សាកគ្មាន ហ៊ានពាលដូចគ្នា !!!
12:10 pm
Positive thinking does not mean only belong to those who has the basic need met. Positive thinking can belong to anybody, in any classes of society, at any environoment condition that one is facing.
I remember, when my family leaving Cambodia to refugee camp in thailand. We didn't have any pan, port,rice or any food to carry with us. But because of my father positive thinking - which he believe that as long as there are people, he will never afraid of hunger. He believe that people are compassion and are willing to share whatever food they have with the family of small children.
But if my father didn't have a positive thinking back than, I would be one of the person who carry the lotus flowers to sale at the New Market in the middle of Phnom Penh today. My father is an amazing man that is a true leader for my family, and willing to take responsibility for his children. All of us four children have at least a master degree in variouse field...
12:10 pm - now can you understand as to why anybody, regardless of their economic status, they have the rights to think positively. Well, allow me take one step further, positive thinking is a human rights thinking for one own benefit without any tangible discrimination of their economics stand in the society!
Wish you have a positive thinking...it will get you far...try it! Or unless you don't want the author to be right, than you can maintain your native thinking - because that is your rights as well!
Put Tom Neay: Hoon Xen will be killed in 2012 by the people. All Cambodia will rise up to make this Put Tom Neay happen.
Hun Sen Thok
12:10 PM understands the words POSITIVE THINKING differently and that's all. He wants to say it is very hard or may be impossible to think positively when you are hungry..
12:37 am,
I understand your point, but have you ever heard the story of a stone soup? You should read it, you might learn something from story.
The bottom-line is that in every momment or situation, there is always a choice for us to choose...we can choose a better one to caring our life to better destination base on the wisdom that we had acquire throughout our life...
Yes, I met those hungry people that live in PP, they came from the provences - no hope except sleep on the cyclo that they rent to make a few thousands riel. Some of them only take a shower one every other day - because it cost 400 riel per buggate...yes, when the hardship bit on them everyday, it is very hard to see any light. But one shouldn't never lost hope - that tomorrow is a better day...just a thought...
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