AN EXTRAORDINARY LIFENovember 5, 2007
By Denise M. Baran-Unland
Special to the Herald News (Joliet, Illinois, USA)
Escaped genocide to start over in Joliet, Choeur Mao of Joliet was the embodiment of strength, a fighter until the very end, said her son Ran Dim of Chicago.
As a young Cambodian mother, Choeur had lost three of her eight children to illness when they were only 11, 9 and 7. In 1975, when the Khmer Rouge became the ruling Communist Party of Cambodia, Choeur's husband Noun Dim died of starvation in the killing fields and her oldest son was killed.
Nevertheless, Choeur protected her younger children with frequent moves until she arrived in the United States in 1981. Here, she strove to assimilate her children into a foreign culture, to provide them with a fine education and to mold them into people of strong character, despite language barriers and few financial resources.
In 1999, Choeur battled a new enemy, kidney failure, a battle she lost at the age of 73 on Sept. 26.
"As for us, the children, we never forget what kind of mother she was, the mother that brought us into this world, the mother that gave us life, love, strength and courage to face whatever came into our lives," Ran said. "Life was still not easy for her here because everything was so different from where she came from, but that really didn't matter."
"She spent her time at home and guided her kids. She wanted us to stay in school and out of trouble. She did not want to see us fail. In Cambodia, children were not allowed to go to school. They had to stay home and help the family. When her children were grown and they got married, she helped them take care of the grandchildren."
Up until 1975, Choeur's life was fairly conventional, middle class and routine. She was married at 16 and, like most women like her, became a typical Cambodian housewife.
"She stayed home and took care of her eight children, feeding them and getting them to school," Ran said. "It was my father's job to bring in the money so she could take care of the children. He was a famous goldsmith, then a gem miner."
After the death of her husband and son, Choeur's life was full of hardships. Feeding the children was no longer a housewifely task; it was now an all-consuming challenge. The older children were sent to work camps, where they had little contact with Choeur and their youngest siblings.
"She always tried her best to protect the rest of the kids from harm's way by moving from one place to another," Ran said.
In 1979, soon after the Vietnamese invaded Cambodia, Choeur, again fearing for her children's safety, moved to Thailand and lived at the Khao I Dang Camp for a year and a half. She then applied for entrance into the United States and on Nov. 1, 1981, Choeur and her children arrived in California, staying there two days before coming to Joliet, where a local sponsor obtained for them a one-bedroom apartment.
On Nov. 8, Choeur took her children to St. Joseph Catholic Church in Joliet for their first Mass in their new home country. There, she met the Rev. Roger Kaffer, now the retired auxiliary bishop of the Diocese of Joliet.
"That moment changed her life," Ran said. "He had a hard time understanding us, so he brought in a wonderful lady from the adult refugee program to talk to us. The next day she brought us a lot of food and another wonderful person came long to get some clothes for the family.
"A week after that, she brought us to St. John's church and introduced us to a wonderful couple to take care of us. With the support of many new friends, she continued to raise us to have a better life in this country than she ever had before."
When her kidneys failed, Choeur impressed upon her children that her illness should not be that important to them. "She always reminded us that it didn't matter what happened to her," Ran said. "For us, the children, we must keep the family together and raise our children to have even better educations and lives than us."
If you would like to see someone featured in "An Extraordinary Life," contact Denise M. Baran-Unland at (815) 467-5249 or artemis279@aol.com.
As a young Cambodian mother, Choeur had lost three of her eight children to illness when they were only 11, 9 and 7. In 1975, when the Khmer Rouge became the ruling Communist Party of Cambodia, Choeur's husband Noun Dim died of starvation in the killing fields and her oldest son was killed.
Nevertheless, Choeur protected her younger children with frequent moves until she arrived in the United States in 1981. Here, she strove to assimilate her children into a foreign culture, to provide them with a fine education and to mold them into people of strong character, despite language barriers and few financial resources.
In 1999, Choeur battled a new enemy, kidney failure, a battle she lost at the age of 73 on Sept. 26.
"As for us, the children, we never forget what kind of mother she was, the mother that brought us into this world, the mother that gave us life, love, strength and courage to face whatever came into our lives," Ran said. "Life was still not easy for her here because everything was so different from where she came from, but that really didn't matter."
"She spent her time at home and guided her kids. She wanted us to stay in school and out of trouble. She did not want to see us fail. In Cambodia, children were not allowed to go to school. They had to stay home and help the family. When her children were grown and they got married, she helped them take care of the grandchildren."
Up until 1975, Choeur's life was fairly conventional, middle class and routine. She was married at 16 and, like most women like her, became a typical Cambodian housewife.
"She stayed home and took care of her eight children, feeding them and getting them to school," Ran said. "It was my father's job to bring in the money so she could take care of the children. He was a famous goldsmith, then a gem miner."
After the death of her husband and son, Choeur's life was full of hardships. Feeding the children was no longer a housewifely task; it was now an all-consuming challenge. The older children were sent to work camps, where they had little contact with Choeur and their youngest siblings.
"She always tried her best to protect the rest of the kids from harm's way by moving from one place to another," Ran said.
In 1979, soon after the Vietnamese invaded Cambodia, Choeur, again fearing for her children's safety, moved to Thailand and lived at the Khao I Dang Camp for a year and a half. She then applied for entrance into the United States and on Nov. 1, 1981, Choeur and her children arrived in California, staying there two days before coming to Joliet, where a local sponsor obtained for them a one-bedroom apartment.
On Nov. 8, Choeur took her children to St. Joseph Catholic Church in Joliet for their first Mass in their new home country. There, she met the Rev. Roger Kaffer, now the retired auxiliary bishop of the Diocese of Joliet.
"That moment changed her life," Ran said. "He had a hard time understanding us, so he brought in a wonderful lady from the adult refugee program to talk to us. The next day she brought us a lot of food and another wonderful person came long to get some clothes for the family.
"A week after that, she brought us to St. John's church and introduced us to a wonderful couple to take care of us. With the support of many new friends, she continued to raise us to have a better life in this country than she ever had before."
When her kidneys failed, Choeur impressed upon her children that her illness should not be that important to them. "She always reminded us that it didn't matter what happened to her," Ran said. "For us, the children, we must keep the family together and raise our children to have even better educations and lives than us."
If you would like to see someone featured in "An Extraordinary Life," contact Denise M. Baran-Unland at (815) 467-5249 or artemis279@aol.com.
4 comments:
To: Oum Daravuth,
Is she the one of your Khmer so called republican? Or the 3 millions who was killed when your uncle cameback (Did your father came back too) to Cambodia ?
You, rascal, that kind of talk is fucking old style that made Khmer killed each other for decades. To say Khmer this , Khmer that, when some one just disagree with your fucking point of view.
In democracy, you Oum Fool, we argue which you stupid head may call it ( fight) with idea, reason, and logic. Not brand marked like your monkey!
Let I answer you about repubican party open in Cambodia in the time of monachy!
1) why you allow that happen?
Why you let people step on law all over the country? ( You I mean the Palace)
-Don't you know it may be the way ah Hun Xen try to get in your nerve and scare the hell out of your father's pans!
-Or your fucken bastard try to trick people let people did wrong and when they do right thing tha can open your dirty face you connected the wrong to the right and accused people of wrong!
This fucking old trick may work when there is no radio nor Tv but not the time of internet, fool!!!
You fucken head should ask to close the party and you fucken fool should not suppress the freedome of press1
If one khmer commeted crime, sue ans put him and her in Jail not to accuse all Khmer as criminal!
Don't you know is no time of Toum Teav that the whold town of Tbong Tmum were condamed!
You fool Oun Shit wake up and be with the rest of the world you fucking head stay in North Korea for too long!!
From who do not care a bout Ah Republic, ah Lonol or ah Sarimatak also Ah Hun Xen and ah Royals or semi royal!
Cambodians women were very courageous during the Pol Pot regime.
All cambodians must love and respect their mother before it is too late because no one can live for ever.
Why using such a stupid language about a woman who had struggled for her chidren survival? There's nothing to do here with Republican or Monarchy. You have lost the least human sense!
But it doesn't mean all other people are behavibng like you.
We are human beings, WE have to appreciate and respect good people,
Yes, there is. The whole Khmer abroad was accused of bieng a republican and our fine lady here proved that she wasn't. Get it?
not 4:23 am, but abosutely there is a real strong connection here, buddy. Please Mr. Uom or whatever his name is, do learn not to stereotype people. Just you know, many of us are scared tahell of you so accusing other of being a Republican and no good for Cambodia. You need to wash your brain with chlorox.
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